Wednesday, February 14, 2007

And Guess What Else I Hate?

"You'd better leave now if you're gonna get a parking spot," I nagged my man helpfully this morning.

"Yeah, and I want to stop for coffee."

"Go through the drive-thru at Starbucks."

"Takes too long. I'll just get some at McDonald's or something."

"It's too bad they closed that one shop across the street from campus. Hey, you're coming straight home, right?"

"No. I thought I'd do a little shopping afterwards."

"But you went to the store yesterday!"

"Honey," my boyfriend says tiredly, "what day is it?"

"Wednesday."

"But what DATE?"

"I--oh."

"Yeah."

"Look, don't get me anything. I thought we agreed last year that we're through celebrating this dumb non-holiday."

"I don't remember that. What's the big deal? Let me get you a little present."

But of course, that means I have to get him a little present. And then 10 days from now, on his birthday, I have to get him another one.

I HATE Valentine's Day.

8 comments:

norbizness said...

Demand he move his birthday to September and fill out the corresponding paperwork in triplicate.

Righteous Bubba said...

Get him half a tie now and give him the other half later.

Anonymous said...

Hear hear! I love the woman in my life with all my heart, but I hate Valentine's Day in (almost) equal measure. Societal extortion, depressing for single people, etc. This year I can claim it's being canceled due to bad weather, I suppose... Medium Dave

gennimcmahon said...

Ah, Valentine's Day. Heteronormative socially engineered consumption, anyone? Oh, hell, I loves me some presents under any guise (but not because I'm a GIRL). I like giving presents almost as much, and wait 'til my new best friend opens his "Penis Pokey" book (a book where "You're The STAR!" and there's a hole cut outta the middle) and gets his gay cowboy magnet, well, it'll be a happy day.

My man and I are morons as far as spreading the holidays out; our anniversary is early December, then there's Christmas, then the birthday of the youngest clan member, then the husband's birthday, then Valentine's and the second youngest clan member's birthday. We get our financial asses handed to us every year.

Oh, and, well, you *could* move the boy's birthday; my father died on my husband's birthday, so my husband had to get a new birthday for awhile. It's still a weird day, though. "Happy Birthday, Honey." "Thanks, Sweetie, oh, uh, sorry about your Dad." "Oh, yeah, thanks."

Chris Clarke said...

*hurriedly cancels truckload o' chocolate*

elyzabethe said...

Did he give buy you a virgin? According to this guy, virgins make the best valentine's day presents: http://article.nationalreview.com/?q=MGNiODQ4YmEzMjc1ODc1YTYwNmIxM2Q5ZWZkZmE3YTM=

Anonymous said...

Could be worse.

You could live in Michigan, where they do Sweetest Day in October on top of it all.

-- zuzu

Sage said...

Here's a crazy idea. Don't buy any presents any more. Just offer a day of your time, your love and devotion, and screw the mass-consumption thing. Be a trend-setter.

I tried it. My guy didn't mind (he says). But then I went out and got stuff for my kids after all because they pooled their allowance to get me stuff. It's too heartbreaking to stop the madness when they're little.