Sunday, December 17, 2006

There Are Exactly Two Things in Life I Know for Sure

1. The first time I locked my keys in my car--that is, approximately 10 minutes after I got it--my father instructed me thusly:

"If you always use your keys to lock the door, instead of pushing down the button and holding up the handle, it is impossible for you ever to lock your keys in the car again."

His advice is largely obsolete now, but not entirely. My boyfriend has the old-fashioned keys. Does he listen to my dad's advice, as I did? (The first time I locked my keys in the car was also my last.) Of course not.

If you have that type of car key, always use your key to lock the door, and you will never risk locking your keys IN the car ever again.

2. If you always type your opening HTML tag, then your closing HTML tag, and then arrow back in between them to fill in the middle, the only way you can leave an open tag is by accidentally hitting the "Insert" key and typing over your closing tag--and that's a far rarer occurrence than simply forgetting to type the closing tag.

Meaning: If you want to italicize text, you first type:

<i></i>

Or

<em></em>

And then you arrow in between them, and type your italicized text.

Same for a hyperlink:

<a href=""></a>

OR, you could just do what my boyfriend did, and break the comments for an entire post by not including that final </a>, thus enclosing the comment "submit" button in a neverending a-href=, forever and ever, amen.

Hope you're enjoying the extra traffic, Pandagon.

4 comments:

sam said...

Heh. I've got you beat. I once locked my keys in my car with my car running. And didn't even realize it until a friend came up to me after homeroom to let me know.

Most embarassing phone call that I ever had to make to my mother.

Rob said...

Two of my buddies and I went to a Queen concert in my car. While we were waiting for the doors to open, we knocked back a few beers (They went through a few joints, too) in the car. I had it running so we could use the AC. When it was time to go, we all got out and left. Car running, lights on, locked up. The car next to me did the same thing. When the concert was over, my Ford LTD was out of gas and had a dead battery. The Toyota next to me was still running. Had to push that heavy ass Ford three blocks in the New Orleans heat and humidity in one of the worst parts of town to the nearest gas station to get gas and a jump.

Kathy McCarty said...

This sounds like I am being sarcastic, but I am NOT!

THANK YOU for splaining to me how to make a hyperlink! I have been Trying to figure it out for a while now...I am doing my blog the "figure it out" method......anyway, you have saved me a lot of time and trouble!

(Before reading your post, I thought it was called a "link", now I know it is called a "hyperlink", which will enable me to google it)

(I have learned MOST of my <> information FORM comment moderation! As in, my commenters know what to do, and I learn from them.)

ilyka said...

Aw, you're welcome, Kathy. Hyperlink or link, I think either term works.

I should have mentioned the rest of it: The actual URL goes in-between the quotation marks, while whatever text you want to use goes in-between the opening and closing tags. Like this:

<a href="http://google.com/">This is a link to Google</a>

Which appears as:

This is a link to Google