Tuesday, October 24, 2006

This One Goes Out to the Guy Who Rammed His Shopping Cart into Me Last Week

And then, yuppie-fashion, gave me the dirty look over it: Next time, consider paying less attention to your phone, stud.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Look, sometimes I have to resort to sneaky tactics. I'm sorry.

What's really sad is, I was trying a "come-hither" look. Apparently all that time spent practicing in front of the mirror was wasted.

Anonymous said...

Nope. Not buying that one. Angus uses a mobile phone all day (we both do) and he-at age 44-still has so many swimmers he can blow a hole through a lead door. Impregnantion at 20 paces and all that.

Besides, radiation doesn't work like that (when I say radiation, I mean of GSM RF, not the glow-in-the-dark kind of radiation.) RF waves for 3G and GSM are like a Christmas tree-they radiate out. So it's more likely that you'll be getting cancer of the throat than cancer of the nads.

Really makes the argument for mobile phone masts interesting. The truth is, you should be cool with one going up right over your house. Christmas trees and all that.

-Helen

Anonymous said...

Plus I couldn't help but be uncharitable and think: People who don't use mobile phones of course have higher sperm count, because they're probably mormon/emotionally repressed/a virgin/insert strange other issue here. People with mobile phones lead hectic normal lives and, you know, wank off and stuff. So the goods are delivered, just not in a test tube.

I'm just saying.

-Helen

ilyka said...

People who don't use mobile phones of course have higher sperm count, because they're probably mormon/emotionally repressed/a virgin/insert strange other issue here.

HELEN!!! It's like you know me! Let's go down the list:

--Mormon: Used to be! It still affects my worlview and what all. Let's count that one as a "yes."

--Emotionally repressed: Like I said, it's like you know me!

--A virgin: Okay, I don't earn no points here.

--Insert strange other issue here: Well. How much time have you got?

:)

ilyka said...

Um, my WORLDVIEW, not my worlview. Although, I gotta say: My worlview is pretty fucking intense.

Anonymous said...

OH. MY. GOD.

Please tell me you have a mobile phone.

If not, you can do, just say the word. Trust me-YOU CAN STOP AT ANY TIME. It's not an addiction.

-Helen

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry, so Ilyka, are you saying you have a high sperm count?