tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post4986208289317976882..comments2023-12-22T03:20:29.631-07:00Comments on Ilyka Damen: And a Perfect Example of What NOT to Doilykahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01286988732452435904noreply@blogger.comBlogger32125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-52152736034289359522007-03-10T23:23:00.000-07:002007-03-10T23:23:00.000-07:00Ha ha look I can admit when I'm being a complete m...Ha ha look I can admit when I'm being a complete moron.<BR/><BR/>Anytime someone starts off with a phrase like that it means they are going to be antagonistic. I know that.<BR/><BR/>My tone online is really abrasive in general, even when I don't mean it to be. Too much debate club in HS or something.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-37542871819696956862007-03-10T01:20:00.000-07:002007-03-10T01:20:00.000-07:00It was incredibly stupid of me to start with "Can ...<I>It was incredibly stupid of me to start with "Can I point out a few things in as non-antagonistic tone as I can?" That was utterly moronic and I fully admit that. Obviously that is an antagonistic tone to take although that wasn't my intent.</I><BR/><BR/>Okay, you gotta admit, that admission was a little bit endearing.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-83632839593341869082007-03-08T13:27:00.000-07:002007-03-08T13:27:00.000-07:00My apologies, tb. I've come late to this whole fro...My apologies, tb. I've come late to this whole froofrah.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-20392618748628256132007-03-08T13:04:00.000-07:002007-03-08T13:04:00.000-07:00e.l.My remark was in reference to the distress he ...e.l.<BR/>My remark was in reference to the distress he is suffering from an inability to put it behind him and go on his merry way. It had to do with what he said he was suffering in another thread.the bewildernesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07897473556532788312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-33708577753708725532007-03-08T10:41:00.000-07:002007-03-08T10:41:00.000-07:00the bewilderness, Margolis isn't asking too much i...the bewilderness, Margolis isn't asking too much if he wants Ilyka to retract the part about him not responding. That's a question of fact, not of perception. <BR/><BR/>I would guess Ilyka's willing to do it, too, if she only has the time.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-59167660553054599082007-03-07T19:26:00.000-07:002007-03-07T19:26:00.000-07:00Rather than fight with you and waste time thinking...Rather than fight with you and waste time thinking up reasons to hate you, or alternately further attempt rational communication, I'll just go on my merry way. You'll always have an 'ally' in me whether either of us likes it or not.<BR/>So you say, but then...suddenly... it's all about taking back that one thing you said about me... oh, and maybe that other thing...<BR/>Listen, please, we all make these kinds of mistakes on the intertoobz when we forget there are real people with ideas and experiences very different from ours perfectly capable of pointing out our foolishness for all to see. These intertubes comments are very like blurting thoughtless remarks. Once or twice is usually enough to teach us better manners.the bewildernesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07897473556532788312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-80248688928795302162007-03-07T17:57:00.000-07:002007-03-07T17:57:00.000-07:00Fair enough. Although I would appreciate at least ...Fair enough. Although I would appreciate at least a slight retraction of the parts of your post flogging me that are simply not true.<BR/><BR/>You can continue to call me an idiot etc (although I would obviously prefer otherwise) but a small "I excoriated this guy for not responding when his comments were moderated out" would be nice.<BR/><BR/>I certainly will admit publically that much of this is my fault for being a dumbass.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-27172565822724857032007-03-07T15:59:00.000-07:002007-03-07T15:59:00.000-07:00Adding a comment to the top of Mikey's post did gr...<EM>Adding a comment to the top of Mikey's post did greatly annoy me. I think the words (dumb as they may be) of a person can stand on their own. If you are going to read this post and decide I'm the dumbest person on earth I'd rather it be because I write like a moron, not because a moderator added a disclaimer saying exactly that to the top of my comments.</EM><BR/><BR/>I sympathize. Here's the thing: Every blog has its shtick, its routine, its culture. At IBTP, the whole comenters-should-strive-for-excellence part of the FAQ is a huge part of the culture.<BR/><BR/>You might notice here I abuse the ellipsis all the TIME, but I ain't gonna do that at Twisty's.<BR/><BR/>Or to flip that around: At Sadly, No! it's perfectly okay to alter your username to goof on somebody like Althouse, and the culture there is that no comments get modded or deleted, no matter how stupid, which is how you get guys like Mario and Shoelimpy hanging out. But I wouldn't complain about any of that because that's the culture. If I don't like it, I don't have to post there.<BR/><BR/>I hesitate to even type this because I don't want to get him flagellating himself again (or writing more songs that don't rawk), but this really all goes back to PP trying to get some dialogue going between blogs that don't share much culturally, socially, or even really politically: It was kinda doomed from the start. But that isn't your fault, obviously.<BR/><BR/><EM>I didn't come in huffing and puffing because I thought all liberal males had been besmirched.<BR/><BR/>What I saw was a liberal male who *was* huffing and puffing at that. I was hoping the response would be a nice quick "we aren't talking about *all* liberal males", something I already understood.<BR/><BR/>In retrospect I should have just posted that myself rather than try to cajole someone else into saying it.</EM><BR/><BR/>Right. I tend to stick up for friends myself, especially if I think they are being piled on over a simple misunderstanding.<BR/><BR/>Well, as I said, the culture clash was inevitable. And, in hindsight, kind of hilarious.<BR/><BR/>No hard feelings.ilykahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01286988732452435904noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-47960405877173930842007-03-07T15:03:00.000-07:002007-03-07T15:03:00.000-07:00Yes that would be me. Take your time, I'm in no hu...Yes that would be me. Take your time, I'm in no hurry.<BR/><BR/>I do feel like a bit of an ass posting off-topic in another thread to get your attention but what is my alternative?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-56785317240071562132007-03-07T07:52:00.000-07:002007-03-07T07:52:00.000-07:00Margalis, are you the anonymous person who asked m...Margalis, are you the anonymous person who asked me specifically to respond to this but, like, from another thread? Because I would say then that you really ARE an ass, but on the other hand, I promised to get to it and after all, you did put so much work into it.<BR/><BR/>SO MUCH work into it.<BR/><BR/>Which is the problem I am having with it just now: It is 7:49 in the ay-em and I would like to sleep, you know, the way I haven't done all night. Lemme look at it when my eyes are rested, okay?<BR/><BR/>I do see, just glancing at it, that where I thought you hadn't replied you were actually stuck in the spamulator (which was probably not an accident). So I apologize for insinuating you were just ignoring me.ilykahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01286988732452435904noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-35971900129148623462007-03-07T03:21:00.000-07:002007-03-07T03:21:00.000-07:00After doing a little homework, allow me to add a b...After doing a little homework, allow me to add a bit more to the post above. (Which you should read first)<BR/><BR/>First, I did not come from S,N, which I had never read until 2 hours ago.<BR/><BR/>I did not realize that S,N and the feminist bloggosphere have some sort ongoing death-match turning every thread into a discussion of fat people and who is more right when they each make stupid generalizations about others.<BR/><BR/>I had the bad luck to wander in in the middle of this epic clusterfuck. (That is not to say my grand entrance was not moronic)<BR/><BR/>I think I came here (or Twistys rather) through a link on Salon and followed it because I agreed with the general sentiment. (And still do)<BR/><BR/>Had I known the Hatfields and McCoys were locked in the mortal combat of manufactured internet drama fucktardary I would have stayed the hell away. <BR/><BR/>Jesus Christ it makes me feel a little silly that I've taken this so seriously, tried to explain myself, worried if I had alienated anyone I fundamentally agreed with - in the midst of a moronic brawl between sanctimonious hypocrites on all sides. "Oh no what have I done? What do all these upstanding thoughtful people think of me now??"<BR/><BR/>LOL. Fuck "TEH DRAMA!!11" and fuck me for stupidly thinking this shit is serious. (Hey, who would win in a fight, Superman or the Death Star?????)<BR/><BR/>I meant everything I said in my previous post, but I no longer care if I am excoriated or not. Please excoriate me further if you so wish, I'll find it amusing. You can think whatever you want of me, I'll fight for what I believe is right just like I always have.<BR/><BR/>I no doubt conducted myself like a drooling idiot, but now I see I am in good company. So rather than heap blame on myself for being the dumbest man in America I'll just consider myself par for the course.<BR/><BR/>This trivial bullshit is a waste of time. I thought that by trying to communicate with you we could reach some agreement and fight for the rights of the oppressed together like rational caring people, or some silly shit like that - not put on our clown shoes and trudge into a prolonged pie fight. You know, working together to affect positive change?<BR/><BR/>For fuck's sake I've barely slept in two nights, being eaten by guilt, thinking about how to make this right.<BR/><BR/>Rather than fight with you and waste time thinking up reasons to hate you, or alternately further attempt rational communication, I'll just go on my merry way. You'll always have an 'ally' in me whether either of us likes it or not.<BR/><BR/>Crabs in a bucket. Christ almighty.<BR/><BR/>MargalisAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-47420912931650010752007-03-06T02:02:00.000-07:002007-03-06T02:02:00.000-07:00"Margalis completely ignored what I wrote, replyin..."Margalis completely ignored what I wrote, replying instead to another commenter in order to repeat the exact same brickheadedly stupid shit he'd tried to lay on me earlier."<BR/><BR/><B>I did respond to what you wrote in relatively benign fashion - my response was moderated out.</B> That is hardly a fair criticism. Of course you may not be aware of that.<BR/><BR/>I may not agree with you (although honestly I don't disagree all that much) but I am honest enough to try to respond to direct questions and comments thrown my way.<BR/><BR/>Unfortunately that was impossible. I didn't ignore what you wrote, I was prevented from responding - hardly the same thing.<BR/><BR/>Also if I may respond to:<BR/><BR/>"It's more like "Mighty nice rights movement you got there. Be a shame if anything (insert signifigant pause here, knuckle cracking optional) happened to it, yannow?""<BR/><BR/>I didn't say this or mean to imply it in any way. (Although the other poster perhaps did) I'm not making some childish threat to withdraw support for a cause - if I believe in something I'll support it. People calling Ann Coulter 'Mann Coulter" or whatever is not "your cause", it's my cause. (Or ours) I'll say it's wrong because it *is* wrong, not because I'm trying to lend patronizing support to the poor gals who need all the help they can get.<BR/><BR/>If you try talking to me instead of mocking and belittling me you may find I'm a pretty reasonable individual. (Or you may not)<BR/><BR/>"Note the narcissistic assumption that his friendship would be of value, as opposed to something sane people would strenuously avoid."<BR/><BR/>Thanks for the kind words. My inclination is to try to be friendly and give people the benefit of the doubt. Friends are generally better than enemies, yes. (No, that isn't a silly threat, just a statement) If you can divine from a selective set of quotations and one-sided analysis that I should be strenuously avoided then more power to you.<BR/><BR/>All the people here have so quickly made up their minds that I'm a troll, flamer or anti-feminist, at least allow me to *attempt* to change your minds. (As in, don't delete my comments then continue to call me a dumbass)<BR/><BR/>By the way I'm a big boy, I never asked to be coddled or cared for. Whatever you have I can take without flinching. All I would ask is that if you are going to mercilessly rag on me at least allow me to defend myself politely and maybe convince one or two people that I'm not the devil incarnate.<BR/><BR/><B>It was incredibly stupid of me to start with "Can I point out a few things in as non-antagonistic tone as I can?"</B> That was utterly moronic and I fully admit that. Obviously that is an antagonistic tone to take although that wasn't my intent.<BR/><BR/>Adding a comment to the top of Mikey's post did greatly annoy me. I think the words (dumb as they may be) of a person can stand on their own. If you are going to read this post and decide I'm the dumbest person on earth I'd rather it be because I write like a moron, not because a moderator added a disclaimer saying exactly that to the top of my comments. I've had bad experiences in the past with moderators actually changing the text of people's comments so I'm a bit touchy about that.<BR/><BR/>When I first read Mikey's post it didn't look to me like he was making some sort of threat. I simply took it as "I generally agree but feel slighted."<BR/><BR/><B>Let me point out that I was not slighted by the original post, I did not take any offense to the 'liberal dudes' stuff.</B><BR/><BR/>I didn't come in huffing and puffing because I thought all liberal males had been besmirched.<BR/><BR/>What I saw was a liberal male who *was* huffing and puffing at that. I was hoping the response would be a nice quick "we aren't talking about *all* liberal males", <B>something I already understood.</B><BR/><BR/>In retrospect I should have just posted that myself rather than try to cajole someone else into saying it.<BR/><BR/>So there you have it. The idiot man-child talks back. Feel free to continue your gleeful bashing, or if you want to actually say something to me I'll reply politely.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-2357383305988804232007-03-05T15:51:00.000-07:002007-03-05T15:51:00.000-07:00I heart you and Twisty. I've tried to address idio...I heart you and Twisty. I've tried to address idiots in comment threads nicely, I've tried explaining things I shouldn't have to explain, and often, I've been ignored (most notably at a lot of the male-centric scienceblogs). I like that there's somewhere I don't have to be nice, and I hate the moments when I'm nice anyway.Katehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16995641658376827290noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-29545262808774115352007-03-05T10:17:00.000-07:002007-03-05T10:17:00.000-07:00Aaaahhh! Burning tickle-me-elmo always freaks me ...Aaaahhh! Burning tickle-me-elmo always freaks me out!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-85590851762455316782007-03-05T09:15:00.000-07:002007-03-05T09:15:00.000-07:00This is my first time delighting in your blog - I ...This is my first time delighting in your blog - I just came from I Blame the Patriarchy. Being able to nail down US foreign policy AND annoying liberal dudes in one fell swoop - impressive. <BR/><BR/>I am sure when I first entered the realm of the Feminist blogosphere that I made plenty of mistakes. But I quickly learned to differentiate between safe spaces and public ones, between places where my input was valid and perhaps necessary and those where it was not. It was an incredibly moving experience learning to shut up and begin really listening.<BR/><BR/>Now if only more men would follow suit, maybe we could get somewhere.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-18805748231679085302007-03-05T07:30:00.000-07:002007-03-05T07:30:00.000-07:00I think I lost the thread of conversation somewher...I think I lost the thread of conversation somewhere. <BR/><BR/>Choosing not to actively make friends with someone, hold their hand, emotionally caretake them, is tossing them on the bonfire?<BR/><BR/>In that case, each and every one of us has tossed at least six billion people on the bonefire. <BR/><BR/>I thought we were discussing the rather massive distinction between rejecting an entire person and choosing not to caretake them; perhaps I misunderstood.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-16661653967002050552007-03-05T05:32:00.000-07:002007-03-05T05:32:00.000-07:00I stumbled here by accident, I've not read the FAQ...I stumbled here by accident, I've not read the FAQ. <BR/><BR/>Off to now though.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-17997043890839421462007-03-05T03:39:00.000-07:002007-03-05T03:39:00.000-07:00It is just too easy to toss people on the bonfire,...<EM>It is just too easy to toss people on the bonfire, because it is easier to be angry. I look at it this way- in my online life I have the time and flexibility to try with some people, and even if I bat .150, that's higher than zero.</EM><BR/><BR/>Shit hell fire, quit making me love you!<BR/><BR/>I'd have BEEN one of those people on the bonfire. I probably still oughtta be. That's why I have never liked the "but he/she's a wingnut" argument as justification for being sexist, racist, whatever, because that could have been me in that hot seat. I never <EM>felt</EM> like a wingnut, never advocated creationism, never got my hate on regarding the same-sex marriage issue, never quit being pro-choice--but I certainly was a wingnut by the popular standards. And I don't want my humanity stripped because I hauled home a truckload of shit thinking it was perfume. That's too frivolous (and ideally, transient) a reason to dehumanize somebody.ilykahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01286988732452435904noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-65770312370477310052007-03-05T02:01:00.000-07:002007-03-05T02:01:00.000-07:00There are lots of people out there that have some ...There are lots of people out there that have some value even if they say some stuff on a certain variety of topics that doesn't fly. ID's heroically relatively even keel flipped some people who at first glance from a particular angle would have led some to believe it was of no use. Not so. It is just too easy to toss people on the bonfire, because it is easier to be angry. I look at it this way- in my online life I have the time and flexibility to try with some people, and even if I bat .150, that's higher than zero. This is why I appreciate ID a lot this last week. She might go to the "fuck you" but she comes back with the "let me try this angle."Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-5463215445425530742007-03-04T21:34:00.000-07:002007-03-04T21:34:00.000-07:00It seems so strange to make an enemy when you can ...<I>It seems so strange to make an enemy when you can make a friend.</I><BR/><BR/>Yeah, because I need lazy illiterate jackasses for friends like I need a hole in the head. <BR/><BR/>Note the narcissistic assumption that his friendship would be of value, as opposed to something sane people would strenuously avoid.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-51287701446932988802007-03-04T19:57:00.000-07:002007-03-04T19:57:00.000-07:00Beautifully done. I've been trying to comment for...Beautifully done. I've been trying to comment for days, since the Thread That Would Not Die, but only now has Blogger determined that I should be able to actually SEE the visual verification thingy.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-3532194778863604102007-03-04T18:09:00.000-07:002007-03-04T18:09:00.000-07:00Glad to hear Twisty's re-writing the FAQ, because ...Glad to hear Twisty's re-writing the FAQ, because I can't understand a damn word of it. When I first read it, the only salient point I took was, "I probably shouldn't post there." So I never have.<BR/><BR/>I liked your explanation to the boyfriend in your last post, Ilyka.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-29153281112972925172007-03-04T17:23:00.000-07:002007-03-04T17:23:00.000-07:00The whole 'don't offend your allies' thing gets me...The whole 'don't offend your allies' thing gets me.<BR/><BR/>It's more like "Mighty nice rights movement you got there. Be a shame if anything (insert signifigant pause here, knuckle cracking optional) happened to it, yannow?"<BR/><BR/>If you're only for my rights as long as I don't make you mad, then you aren't really for my rights, dude.Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09680390822529919966noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-53122541490131030452007-03-04T16:28:00.000-07:002007-03-04T16:28:00.000-07:00While I might excuse some of the hypersensitivity ...While I might excuse some of the hypersensitivity experienced at IBTP (I have experienced twinges of it myself at times), and even if you neglect to read a blog's FAQ (shame on you!), there is a universally valid rule of culture:<BR/><BR/><B><I>When you're in someone else's backyard, you play by their rules. If you don't like the rules, you can go play somewhere else.</B></I>BubbasNightmarehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17437369744880812310noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29906474.post-89617731686743802812007-03-04T15:35:00.000-07:002007-03-04T15:35:00.000-07:00The song most definitely does not rock. It's in t...The song most definitely does not rock. It's in the TF in box.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com